Have you done the Milk Crate Challenge yet? I know I haven’t and if I catch my oldest offspring doing it, she’ll have some ‘splanin to do in addition to losing her phone.
What this involves is stupid people who set up milk crates in a pyramid formation and try to walk from one side to the other without falling. Naturally, plenty of people have failed and ended up with all sorts of injuries because of it. I know I’m going to have a hard time negotiating with St. Peter thanks to my schadenfreude fetish but I take great delight in seeing those who missed out on the Tide Pods-consumption craze writhe in pain and wonder what in the hell they got themselves into while heading for what is most likely hospitalized traction. Stay classy, gang.
Stuff your ‘poor me’
Remember those times you woke up after a long night spent at the rec hockey tournament beer garden? That three-hour workout where you, like, totally feel the burn? Yeah — get stuffed.
Allow me to introduce you to Ibrahim Hamadto of Egypt. He’s a table tennis player who competed at the 202(1) Summer Paralympics in Tokyo, which would be awesome enough. But take a closer look at Hamadto and you’ll see he isn’t just any table tennis player with a slight disability. Go find his picture while you enjoy this little musical interlude with bonus points if you can pick out the song (Hint: the singer is Welsh):
(Feels like I’m standing in a timeless dream … of light mists, of pale amber rose … feels like I’m lost in a deep cloud of heavenly scent … touching, discovering you …)
Oh, 1996. Great year. Also a year where I lost my courage one day in high school following a CPR lesson that went very awry … anyway, did you find it? Yeah, he has no arms after he lost them at the age of 10 as a result of a train accident. He plays with the racquet in his mouth and he’s rather good at it. Because he has no hands to hold the ball, Hamadto has to place the ball on his foot and flip it up high enough so he can make contact. He played in Class 6, which is for those who can walk but have impairments with their arms and legs, and would have been my favourite no matter the result. Simply remarkable stuff and the kind of thing which proves yet again that only 96.1 per cent of sports resembles equine by-product.
Next time you think you’re having it rough, remember people like Ibrahim Hamadto.
Proper etiquette, please
No matter what you think of golfer Bryson DeChambeau — I personally like him — you don’t do what Patrick Cantlay did during the final round of the BMW Championship on Aug. 29.
DeChambeau was lining up an approach shot on the 14th and, out of the corner of his eye, saw Cantlay walking up the fairway. DeChambeau rather curtly asked him to stop walking and you could tell it rattled DeChambeau as he had to go back through his pre-shot routine. Now, some of you are wondering what the big deal is. Well, golf is a sport rooted in tradition and etiquette and one thing you just don’t do is anything that interrupts or disturbs someone else in the action of trying to take a shot.
It’s right up there with walking across someone’s line before a putt (spike marks on the green) or having a conversation while someone is trying to shoot. It’s just plain rude and goes against what should happen on a golf course, no matter if you’re between zero to six beers into it.
I’m on Team Bryson on this one.
And finally …
Good Idea: Engaging with fans.
Bad Idea: Engaging with fans by telling them they suck.
When fans pay their money to go watch a sporting event, they will say something be it good or bad. That’s how it goes. The New York Mets, though, thought they would be smart and let the fans know how much they appreciate the times they boo them.
If you’ve paid attention, some players on that other New York baseball team have been giving the thumbs-down sign whenever they have a big hit. Why? Javy Baez says it all to let the fans know how they feel about being booed. He backed it up by reminding fans that he feels bad when he gets booed when he strikes out and he’s going to do the same thing when he does something good.
Well, that’s what fans do, Javy. They cheer when you’re doing good and will let you know when you’re doing bad. More often than not, fans simply want to see a good effort out there and if they don’t think it’s there, you can expect a few choice words. Dropping a deuce on your paying customers isn’t exactly the best way to do business nor does acting like a five-year-old doing the whole nanny-nanny-boo-boo thing cut it.
Sounds like someone can’t handle playing in New York.
Until next time, folks …