The city has opened all its facilities to the public, except for city hall. Why is that? Come to think of it in the last two years, for most of the of the time city hall, the legislative assembly or even the house of commons have been closed to the public. Are all the politicians and bureaucrats shielding themselves from the public or been in hiding?
There have also been a lot of strange and illogical things going on. It is as if we have been living through a horror movie or maybe a remake of the movie, “The Invasion of the Body Snatchers”. That’s when aliens take over as exact replicas of people, only they lack emotions, empathy, common sense and know very little about humans and the planet. Why? Because they are aliens of course.
Here is a case in point. On the new proposed bylaw, a permitted use called “Urban Agricultural Commercial” was put back in. Which means if someone wants to turn a lot in the middle of a residential neighborhood into a fish processing and selling facility, they can, and no one could complain because it is “bylaw” Also they can create urban farms. What kind of farm? Well glad you asked. It says a farm to raise small livestock to create products. This would include but not be limited to hens, ducks, quail, rabbits, goats, and pigs. Yes even pigs!
I really don’t know what planet these aliens are from, but it certainly isn’t earth if they consider pigs to be small animals. “Big Bill”, a pig in the USA, set a record when it weighed in at 1,157 kg. That is one-and-a-quarter tonne. Most pigs when they get big enough to slaughter weigh 140 to 300 kilograms. So, they are bigger than most humans that I know.
If you have ever visited a commercial pig farm, urban or otherwise, they are very noisy and smelly places. Not only could you have a pig farm next door with a hundred or so swine, but a slaughterhouse and retail shop to sell the product. Maybe you would have an urban chicken barn across the street and an urban insect farm down the road. Not sure what kind of insects they are talking about, because they don’t specify them, but it sounds pretty alien to me. Interesting enough they specify that one can’t grow or sell pot from your house and no commercial agriculture would be allowed in land designated as IG or Industrial General Zone, where one might think these farms belong, but no explanation is given.
They also want to include “Commercial Recreation”. So, if your neighbour wants to set up an outdoor bar for tourists, along with a daily pig roast, why not? Or how about a business to rent motorcycles and snowmobiles to tourists. Just what your sleepy little residential neighborhood needs is motorcycles and snowmobiles roaring up and down the streets 24 hours a day. And you can’t question this because it is allowed in the new proposed “bylaw.” I wonder do people have to show proof of being a tourist? And what happens if a local resident slips in.
There is a section for convenience stores and for the food and beverage services allowed in residential neighborhoods that is a little mind blowing. A convenience store can serve food but not the type of food you would find in a restaurant and a restaurant can serve food but not the type of fast food you would find in a convenience store. Then there are drive-in food establishments mentioned but not drive-thrus.
If you thought a residential neighborhood was residential this new bylaw says otherwise. You could be surrounded by urban farms, bars and restaurants, indoor ones and outdoor ones.
I have no idea who thought up or wrote these rules, but my first reaction was, these are way too confusing and bizarre! So maybe we have indeed been invaded by a group of Alien Body Snatchers and they are now in charge! Never to late to let the city know what you think. My question is we have tests for Covid-19 but is there a test for alien body snatchers.
